I'm trying to be fucking creative over here, but nothing is happening. The more times I think about getting creative or running around the block, (I feel) the closer I am to actually doing it. And so it blooms.
I'm so unhappy at my job right now. And I am so unhappy with where I am in school. And I feel like that doesn't need to reflect on my personal / extra-curricular life or who I am because they are separate things that need not weigh the other down, but I feel like feelings about one thing is over lapping into feelings about the other. I feel myself wanting to escape, like NOW. There's nothing I want to do more right now than to sleep for the next 30 days and wake up with everything sorted out. I'm trying to brush my feelings under the rug because they are too overwhelming to think about all at once. My mind's telling me that I need to peace the fuck out of reality, but I can play tricks on my mind, too y'know.
I'm scared, okay? I'm really scared all the time. I'm like very scared all the time.
